Reply To: Welcome to The DadsNet forum

Ian P

Hi All

My name is Ian, and i’m due to be a Dad in June, to our first. I found the group through the podcast Don’t tell your mum, its brilliant!! I would really appreciate some advice.

I have successfully gained a place on a PE PGCE, starting in August, 3 months after our baby is born!!

TBH i am sh*tt*ing being a Dad, but extremely excited. The PGCE will put certain pressures on me and my family, which I’m not sure its fair to do – these are in no particular order!

1) Financial – I will only get certain loans and grants to help, which may (we’re still working through budgets) put a strain on us. TBH my wife has been saving like a trooper to cover her gap in maternity pay. I feel guilty as potentially doing this its not fair to her and will destroy the plans she’s had i.e. more time at home, using our savings for the baby and not to keep us afloat etc.
2) Family – There is going to be a lot of study in this course. My wife will need me and so will my baby. Is it fair that I do this? Will I miss out on special moments :-(
3) Mental health – I’ve suffered in the past with work related stress and am scared what this will do to me. If i do it, I feel there is no going back and I will have to carry on because I have a son and wife to look after!

So you’re prob a) switched off this, because the message is long b) thinking why the hell does he want to do this? Well

1) I want to give back and have a job where I actually feel valued – I don’t get that in my current industry and have tried to carve a career for 10 years, be happy and on a decent salary. Honestly I’ve tried so hard in my industry :-( :-( I’ve also wanted to do this for a very long time and actually been accepted at last. PE is an extremely competitive PGCE where you’re often in competition with 300 other candidates for a place on the course!
2) Its short term pain for long term gain – Within a year I should be back salary wise where I am now, I hopefully will be happy at work and ill be in an industry which is fairly secure. I would hope to climb the scale quicker as well
3) My wife is teacher, so in theory we would have exactly the same holidays! I have to take the same holidays as her anyway.

Thank you to anyone who replies x