My daughter is 2.5yr now. She had reflux and we had an awful first year 18 months not able to get a sleep pattern or routine sorted. So much so that at one stage the only way to settle/sooth her to sleep was mummy breast feeding or rocking her to sleep. I had no look in. Any attempt by me to get her to sleep was an absolute no go. As that abated we then hit the separation anxiety stage of development whenever mummy would leave the room we would have tears. Then we had the return to work. I do one day daddy daycare and we had a phase of “i want mummy… where’s mummy”
It’s hard. Very hard because the workload is on mummy but the stress occurs between mummy and daddy. Her stress is I’m not pulling my parental weight and my stress is I cant do anything because I’m not mummy.
However I’ve learned not to take it personally. Which was a hard pill to swallow. But we have reached a point recently where the child is rebelling a bit and when mummy says “let me brush your hair/teeth get you dressed etc” out of defiance the young un will say “Daddy do it..” it’s hard work. But the rewards come as fast as the frustrations. Just keep doing the best job you can do.