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Coping with partners PND

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      Benjamin Jones
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      Hi all, I’m not sure this is the correct place for this, so please move/delete if required.

      I am just wondering how people have got through a period of time where their partner has suffered from PND.

      A bit of back story for my situation, my now wife had suffered a newborn loss before we met, she never dealt with this and this has now become a problem. Fast forward 6 years she and I had a little girl, this was an extremely anxious period of time, with scans every 2 weeks to help ease her anxiety regarding this pregnancy. We were told our daughter was very small and had stopped growing, she was delivered via an emergency C section. Turns out she was absolutely fine, just a little on the small side but nowhere near as small as we were made to think. My wife suffered a period of PND for the months following, however I was in the dark about this and had to deal with a really difficult partner and a newborn baby. I was felt very guilty for going to work, I would recieve texts and phone calls from which I had to leave work, because of this my colleague and bosses became very frustrated.

      We almost didn’t make it through this period. But things started to get better and we began to enjoy our daughter.

      Fast forward another 4 years and we are now married and have a baby boy. Again this was a very worrying time for her going through the pregnancy. Another emergency C section (due to ruptured uturus) and a week in NICU for our son and we are at home, I am in a different job which allows me to WFH (which is a good and bad thing.)

      Currently I am really struggling, my wife has been diagnosed with PTSD for which she is getting treatment. She seems to have become more depressed in the last couple of weeks. She is trying really hard to get better. Our daughter is 4 years old and is obviously still adjusting to having a little brother and also starting school this year. She is defiant, doesn’t listen when we ask her to do things. Getting ready for school is now a daily battle. But ultimately she is a well behaved and polite child, at least at school.

      Now for how I am feeling about all of this, in the last week I have found it is too much, I know I need to make more effort to get out of the house but I feel guilty, just incase one of the children plays up for my wife. Has anyone been in any similiar scenarios? If so what avenue of help did you go down?

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