Losing temper

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This topic contains 3 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Steven Tunas-Bana 3 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #27886

    Rodduz
    Participant

    Hi,

    First post!

    I have a 2 year old daughter and we very much get on most of the time. But I spend a lot of time with her and it stresses me out. Think I have some kind of anxiety to the situations as I’m constantly thinking like is she going to eat her breakfast, is she going to wall into pre-school or kick off? Then when it happens I’m so stressed I lose my temper. I dont really shoit at her but I mutter things under my breath and they’re not very nice.

    I don’t want to do it. What help do you think I can get? Anxiety help? Anger management?

    I love her loads and everyone says she is a daddy’s girl just I’ve lost my way a bit. Like been too lenient and she expects treats off me too much and if doesn’t get she has melt down so I go and give and it’s a vicious circle etc etc.

    Any help much appreciated..

    Thanks

  • #27894

    Dominic Hayhoe
    Keymaster

    Sounds like you’re very hard on yourself. Young children can be very hard work and very demanding. It will get easier as she gets older and you can negotiate and discuss things more with her.

    Try to keep in mind that you’re doing the very best you can for your daughter, so when she has a tantrum you can remain calm.

    Losing your rag too is a vicious circle as it feeds your child’s traits. They will copy what they see, so if you can remain calm whilst she’s having a meltdown, it will help in time hugely.

    Also, try to be strong when disciplining and don’t give in to her demands as by doing so you’re just making a rod for your own back.

    Children need to know where the line is, it makes them better behaved because they feel secure and safe. Children without boundaries are the one’s who end up poorly behaved as they are unsure where the line is.

  • #27904

    Rodduz
    Participant

    Thanks. Makes sense, I will try. Definitely need to stick to some stricter rules for a start.

  • #27969

    Steven Tunas-Bana
    Participant

    This sounds like a fairly common problem firstly it sounds like your doing a fab job we have three kids two boys (11 & 9) and a little girl who is 7 months old. Both our boys are on the autistic spectrum so tantrums and screaming and shouting have become the norm in our house but like Dominic has said staying calm is a must the more flustered you become the harder it will be to stay in control on the situation. As for muttering under your breath show me a parent who hasn’t it’s a way to release I mean would you really want your daughter to hear something that you don’t mean but say in the heat of the moment. Having two autistic boys we have to work to routine perhaps that could help by trying to take a bit of the unknown out a situation. Hope some of this has helped but remember you are a GOOD dad and that your daughter loves you even when she is not happy

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